Not only a new beginning to my r/s life, I’m again on diet! I will make myself diet now.. Been dragging for so long and no results. Determination Chris!

Current plan: stop investment and start to prepare fishing rod

Main focus: Evolve & Yoghurt business

Target: Choose a better ocean to fish

Life is a choice, so is love.
Choices are made by individuals
Outcome is a subset of choices
So, what outcome do I want?
That is the main important

Care not what people think
Care more on what you think
Live life to the fullest
Without regrets

寂寞才找我

我看见自己写下的心情 把自己放在卑微的后头 等你等太久 想你泪会流
而幸福快乐是什么

爱的痛了 痛的哭了 哭的泪了 日记本泪页页执著 记载著你的好 像上瘾
的毒药 它反覆骗著我

爱的痛了 痛的哭了 哭的累了 矛盾心里总是强求 劝自己要放手 闭上眼
让你走 烧掉日记重新来过

唱不完一首歌
疲倦还剩下黑眼圈
感情的世界伤害在所难免
黄昏再美终要黑夜
依然记得从你口中说出再现坚决如铁
昏暗中有种烈日灼身的错觉
黄昏的地平线
划出一句离别
爱情进入永夜
依然记得从你眼中滑落的泪伤心欲绝
混乱中有种热泪烧伤的错觉
黄昏的地平线
割断幸福喜悦
相爱已经幻灭

She committed herself into this r/s by agreeing to be together. Though I do not know how much she has done for me, and I know she does, I still do not see her trying hard to make things work. It really piss me off, no joke. I am here trying to bust myself for her and a mere basic care and concern wasn’t shown, is hard for me to accept.

Many a times, I tell myself to look at the bright side and be optimistic, is seriously a tough thing to do at times when what I see and perceive does not match with my optimism. Have you come across an experience where the situation is real bad and there’s no light to be seen from an optimistic point of view? This is what I’ve been and currently facing.

I keep hearing from people that their r/s is not doing very well and stuff, but I swear, you do not want to be in my shoes. Is totally nerve wrecking and helpless a situation to be imagined. Needless experienced.

First, she told me she’s ready to be in a r/s. But viewing from the current situation, either I’m not aware of the real meaning “ready to be in a r/s” or I’m fooled. Any of the reason, is care and concern too much to ask for? I am not asking for much, just basic genuine care and concern is able to satisfy me for now. I guess my friends around me are more concern about my well-being compared to her. Speechless..

I tried taking myself out of my view and see things from her shoes. I look at the situation from many different angles, still I could not figure what on earth she’s thinking. Only if she’s willing to share what she’s thinking, I’d be kissing the floor by now, eating grass. The problem is, she don’t. Totally shut off and act blur (as though everything was perfectly fine).

I have come to a point where I’m past getting upset, and landed up feeling nothing but anger. Is when you go drinking, U pass the drunk period and go straight from tipsy to sober. This part of my life, is called numbness. Where whatever thing she does doesn’t affect your emotions no more. I don’t know if is good or bad, but being numb at times where pain is trying to influence you is good.

I am totally clueless how this is going to end up. I asked many friends around and all the feedback I’ve gotten are not what I wanted. Coming back to it, why would I still want to cling on? I guess is now a challenge for me to get out of this shit I’ve gotten into and test my perseverance to bad situations.

I guess there’s nothing for me to complain about. This world is about karma. It must be me doing something wrong and this is what I get in return. Ohh well, accept my live and move on. Be a better person next time.

Anyway, Expendables is a good movie. Is funny and at the same time fierce. Worth the money watching.

Was now thinking of starting a yoghurt business in school! Overall, the major problem is school (is always be the school that drag you down). Kinda funny eh, usually starting a business, capital is the problem. For me, is the school! To get sth approved from the school, it took decades, years, ages, whatever U name it. Just hate the feeling of hanging for the result for so long. And you know what.. Most of the time is rejected. Makes U feel kinda shit. So school is the main concern now. To get the slot for u to set up my business and approval to do it. Dang!
Is gonna be a team of 3, Flo, Syl and myself. We are going to push this project to a reality.
Concept’s simple: Yoghurt has set a market in Singapore, Np hasn’t got a yoghurt shop. Simple as that.
Effort Required: 110% from everyone to come out with a proposal with many things to be considered.
Actual implementation: Theory and practical is always different. Furthermore, is my team’s 1st experience to set up a business. Much guidance is needed.
Time of implementation: Opening on April study semester
I hope this is going to be a success!

我寧願看著妳
睡的如此沉靜
勝過妳醒時決裂殷無情

妳說妳想要逃
偏偏注定要落腳
情滅了愛熄了
剩下空心要不要
春已走花又落
用心良苦缺成空
我的痛怎麼形容
一生愛錯放妳的手

我的痛怎麼形容
一生愛錯放妳的手

My paper today (ITLG) wasn’t that great nor bad either. But I had a great day today. After exam came back home to read my book “Men are from Mars, Women are from venus Forever” It teaches us how to handle relationship problems. These few days I’ve been into books that help relationship a great experience. The one that i would recommend is the “5 Love Languages by Dr Chapman”. Is really a very awesome book that connects everything I’ve learn for the past few years. Everyone should grab a piece of that book and have a read if you want to have great relationship. Those who already enjoying, you might find it useful and make it a better one.

Tomorrow was my SOM paper (2nd last) and after tomorrow, at least I can slack and concentrate on martial arts, magic and drums. I’ve missed a lot of these during the past few months. I’ve decided to continue what I do everyday and relationship was just an enhancer to add colours to my life. It should affect my daily routine. I should focus on discipline. Discipline is the only way one could accomplish something. “Pain is temporary, quitting is permanent” is the quote Mhd Ali said during his road to championship.